This is what I get for being all whee! accomplishment! the other day. I can't settle to do anything, I haven't got anything done, and there have been no words written on either big bang or my other lgbt fest fic. And I know if I just started, on either one, I'd get in the mood and keep going, and I know what I want to write, for both of them, and I just can't settle to do it. Gah!
Plus, I was plotting out the rewrite of Doppelganger in my head last night instead of going to sleep and - don't ask me how I managed not to notice before - realised I'm going to have to kill someone. I don't want to kill anyone :( And, okay, it's not going to be anyone major (despite me nearly putting either Keller or Lorne into that position before I realised) but... I don't want to kill anyone. Particularly since I don't actually know who it would be... preferably not Heightmeyer, since that's what the show did, but that doesn't leave me with any characters from the show who I'd want to have die. It's a problem.
As is the fact that I'm pretty sure my gender tutor is going to realise who said mostly negative things on her evaluation this morning, particularly since she caught me making my 'you're wrong but I don't want to argue' face in class. But she was talking about the internet being a male space and when I mentioned slash fandom as a female dominated space, she basically said that it wasn't important and didn't count. Unlike chatrooms, which was what she was talking about, because apparently all chatrooms are filled with insensitive sexist men who make inappropriate comments to any woman who wanders in. None of them are polite and welcoming, and there doesn't exist a single female dominated chatroom on the whole internet, and well, even if there did, clearly that wouldn't count, like female dominated slash fandoms.
Yeah, I still think she's a bad teacher; and I wouldn't mind that she knew I said these things (well, I would, since I imagine she'll know which one my essay is as well, anonymous marking or not) but we've got another class next week. I kind of really want to skip it, just in case.
You know, well over two decades of education of various types, I've never been glad that a class was finishing, ever. Not until I took this one, and it makes me really sad. I love education, I love taking classes and learning things (to the point of doing Open University modules despite having a degree already, before I came back to do my masters), and if this was the only class I was taking this term, I don't think I'd want to come back next year.
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